How to be ‘Nasty’ in four different ways
Social media attracts its fair share of unwelcome comments. Today’s #bekind is tomorrow’s #screwyou!
Within the behavioural psychology of nasty comments, we find that each of the four main character types has its own nasty side.
Within the behavioural psychology of nasty comments, we find that each of the four main character types has its own nasty side (for an overview reminder of the colour types, click here).
Who do YOU become when you’re being nasty?
My own predominant colour is YELLOW. We can take the piss and put others down using our ‘acerbic wit’. We’ll send a sarcastic or scathing remark which WE think is funny – then can’t understand why others take offence! We then go all petulant and make out it’s THEIR fault.
Then we have GREEN types. At extremes, this type can become the ‘victim to the cause’. They can become travel agents for the ‘Guilt Trip’. They’ll claim the moral high ground – and take on someone else’s fight. Ultimately they may even resort to name calling. So there!
Our friends in the RED corner will fire off a withering response and feign surprise when someone disagrees. Red energy can be blunt – ‘I’m right – you’re wrong’… no shades of grey. Their force of personality in their responses can be intimidating – evening threatening.
BLUE stress will lead to a pedantic response. They KNOW they are correct (because they have researched it) and no one else has a right to their point of view because everyone else is stupid. This can be extremely patronising – especially when they are dismissing any emotional aspects of the issue.
Now, none of US would ever act like this, but it’s certainly ‘available’ to us at each extreme of our personality styles. So here are a few guidelines when dealing with nastiness on your facebook feed:
1 If they revert to nasty posts, they simply don’t get it. You will not change their minds. They will drag you down to their miserable level – then beat you with experience. #notinthegame
2 So ignore it. There is no power in their comment if it polls zero reaction from you. In psychological tests, the most frustrating response you can give to someone is NO response. #befrustrating
3 For clarity – visit THEIR facebook page. A quick scroll down their own feed, photos and other posts will give you a measure of who they really are, and will have you muttering “Ahhh NOW I understand!” #idiot
4 If YOU disagree with someone else’s post and feel the irresistible need to respond. Then first take a deep breath – and ensure you’re not flicking to your ‘Nasty Colour’. It’s rare but some great debates CAN take place on soc med. But, I say again, it’s rare!!!!
5 #bekind (and if you can’t #bekind, #bequiet)!!
6 Or let them have both barrels and suffer the spiral down into the land of ‘shitty’!
Yoo Wisdom: Too much stress and energy is given to rantings and ravings… If you simply can’t choose a complete ‘Digital Detox’ then decide on a ‘Response Review’. Before you hit that keyboard, understand that, if we all thought and felt exactly the same, then some of us wouldn’t be necessary!
Be your best Yoo!
Andy (and the team at Yoo)
PS Understand more about how we are different by checking out my book “Why Can’t People Be More Like Me?!” Simply click the tab at the top of this page marked “BOOKS”